Funny limericks about dating

My neighbor came over to say, Although not in a neighborly way, That he'd knock me around, If I didn't stop the sound, Of the classical music I play. There once was a man stuck in a stall, He tried to get out but would fall. One day a man flushed, The fat man just blushed, And quickly ran out of the mall.

There was a young lady of Cork, Whose Pa made a fortune in pork. He bought for his daughter, A tutor who taught her, To balance green peas on her fork. And as for my Hair, I'm glad it's all there, I'll be awfully said, when it goes. A newspaper man named Fling, Could make "copy" from any old thing.

Funny Grins

But the copy he wrote, Of a five dollar note, Was so good he is now wears so much bling. A man and his lady-love, Min, Skated out where the ice was quite thin. Had a quarrel, no doubt, For I hear they fell out, What a blessing they didn't fall in!

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There was a young lady of Lynn, Who was so excessively thin. That when she assayed, To drink lemonade, She slipped through the straw and fell in. There was an enchanting young bride, Who ate many green apples and died.

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The apples fermented, inside the lamented, and made cider inside her inside. There once was a man from kanass, Who's nuts were made out of brass.


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There once was a boy named Dan, who wanted to fry in a pan. He tried and he tried, and eventually died, that weird little boy named Dan. I need a front door for my hall, The replacement I bought was too tall. So I hacked it and chopped it, And carefully lopped it, And now the dumb thing is too small.

One Saturday morning at three, A cheese monger's shop in Paree. Collapsed to the ground, With a thunderous sound, Leaving only a pile of de brie.

Five Limericks (in the Style of Edward Lear)

I once fell in love with a blonde, But found that she wasn't so fond. Of my pet turtle named Odle, whom I'd taught how to Yodel, So she dumped him outside in the pond. When it comes to self-contradiction, Mitt Romney is both fearless and peerless. Limerick "My spouse likes to lie in the sun, Absorbing those rays just for fun. Your forehead and frown lines erase?

Dump the public option, or I filibuster. It sounds like an unlikely theme for a Broadway play, but playwright Sarah Ruhl pulls it off in her In the Next Room or the vibrator play, about hysteria, a 'disease of the womb.

75 Funny Limericks guaranteed to make you smile!

Yes, I was shocked too. Jay Rockefeller and others indicate that a strong public option could become a reality, if only President Obama stopped being a Bystander President. Hoping to learn something and to express your opinion? Well, be sure to bring a pair of ear plugs. Now we have Sen. Did I Say Secession? Limerick "For such a fan of secession, Texas Gov.

Dirty Limericks

Rick Perry sure is quick to ask for federal bucks. Antiviral medications to combat swine flu?

A Limerick Explanation "This space has been quiet of late. And you thought the United States was a litigious country.

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My tooth aches,' a man told the nurse, Whose answer was biting and terse: Limerick "There once was a drunken, loud fellow Who ordered his drinks with a bellow. Limerick "The play was quite talky and lacked Something crucial. It had but one act. It's a gift to insurance co thugs Your pain is no excuse. The doctor who prescribed your weed, We'll string up with a noose Oops -- Never Mind.